Meet Me at Little Italy
by Artdirector123
Summary: When Ezio is on the run from Royal guards, he has a strange encounter with a little hyper italian child with an undesernable gender and a a blond germanic boy with a sword. Read on to find out what happens. Rated C for Cracktastic. One shot.


Author: I do not own hetalia or Assassin's creed.

WARNING!: this fanfic copious amonts of randomness.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx xxxxxxxxxxxxx

(one day in Venice, Italy during the renaissance)

Ezio ran as fast as he could. Royal guards were after him, again. It probably wasn't the best idea to try and assassinate that duke out in the open. How was he supposed to know the guy had at least 500 guards?! Luckily, they weren't too smart. He rounded the corner into an alley way and sat on the nearest bench. The guards kept running forward until they passed him. After a few minutes, he felt the coast was clear and decided to get up when suddenly...

"Hello friend!" a tiny voice said. Ezio turned around in surprised to see a little girl/boy/gender neutral chibi thing. It was sitting on the bench swinging its legs with a big smile on its face.

"WHAT THE HELL?! WHERE DID YOU COME FROM?!" Ezio yelled. This child just appeared out of nowhere. he was wearing a green dress and a little apron. The child had hazel colored hair and a strange curl.

"Ms. Hungary says a stork brought me!" said the child smiling, "She says I'm special!"

Ezio facepalmed. "That's not what I meant..." he said, face still in palm.

"Do you like pasta?" the child asked.

"Uhhh...sure...?" Ezio said, a bit confused by the randomness of the question.

The child's smile widen and he appeared to get happier (if that was even possible) and he shouted, "YAAAAAAAAYYY!~" and tackle hugged Ezio.

"WHAT THE-?!" was all Ezio had time to say before the child glomped him. He struggle to get the little one off, but child's grip didn't loosen.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx xxxxxxxx

(Meanwhile, somewhere sorta nearby)

The Holy Romen Empire in Venice at this time, wandering the streets for the girl (as far as he knew) that he loved, Italy. He was absolutely in NO WAY stalking Italy (at least in his mind). He was simply checking up on her and making sure she was safe from thugs, or wild animals, or men with "free candy", or France, or thieving merchants, or rouge lute players who had too much to drink (he knew those musicians in tights couldn't be trusted).

He was just about to walk past an alley way when he heard voices, one being very high pitched. He peeked into the alley to see a man in a hood trying to pull a young child off of him. Holy Rome instantly realized that child was Italy, and also realized (unlike seemingly everyone else in the city until about five minutes ago) that the man, with all his weapons, was an assassin! Immediately, his mind raced for an answer to what was happening. In doing so, it completely overlooked the completely rational idea that Italy randomly hugged the poor man -like Italy does whenever he meets someone new- and jumped to the conclusion that the assassin was trying to hurt Italy! He immediately jumped into action.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx 

(back to Ezio and Italy)

Ezio tried desperately to remove the little munchkin from him, but alas, the little child's hug was too tight. When he was about to give up he heard a shout and looked up. A young boy was running down the alley towards him.

"DON'T YOU DARE HURT HER!" he shouted unsheathing a sword. The child let go as Ezio unsheathed his own sword. the young boy slashed at Ezio with his sword, but being the trained assassin he was, Ezio blocked each strike. Whenever Ezio tried to attack, the boy could block his strikes as well. It went on like this for some time.

Ezio was impressed with the boy's skill. 'How can he fight so well?! He looks bearly a day over eight!' he thought 'How can I beat him?'

Suddenly, Ezio heard a voice in his head. "Use the force Ezio, Use the force!" the voice (*cough* Altiar *cough*) said. Ezio was distracted for long enough that the boy was able to disarm him.

'What the?! Who are you, why are you here? What's "the force"?!' he thought.

"1. My identity cannot be revealed to you until _Assassin's Creed: Revelations_. 2. I am here as a plot device and because shut up this is a fanfic. 3. It's your hidden blade idiot. Now no more stupid questions, just use your freaking hidden blade!" the voice said.

'Okay...' Ezio thought to himself. He came out of his train of thought long enough to realize the boy was about to strike again.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx xxxxx

(meanwhile, somewhere very different)

Author: AHHHHHHHHH! THE CHARACTERS HAVE BECOME SELF AWARE! IT'S THE END OF THE WORLD!1!111

Author's brother:*walks in* Uhhh...What are you doing?

Author: *turns off screen* Uhhh...nothing!

Author's brother: Aren't you supposed to be studying?

Author: I-I I was!

Author's brother: Then why was a fanfic on your screen?

Author: Because...SHUT UP I'M BUSY!

Author's brother: *shrugs* Whatever. *leaves*

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx xxxxxxxxxxxx

(back to the story)

Ezio quickly pulled out his hidden blade and stabbed the boy...through the heart. The boy fell over, seemingly dead.

"NOOOOOOOOO! HOLY ROME!" the child with the hazel colored hair ran over to the little boy.

"Crap! did I just kill a kid?!" Ezio said to himself. He started to feel bad for a second before the boy got up and pulled the blade out of his chest, wincing in pain. Ezio's jaw dropped as he stood there dumbfounded at what had just happened. "WHAT THE HECK?!" He yelled.

"YAAAAAY! Holy Rome! You're okay!" the child with the hazel colored hair said happily as he tackle hugged Holy Rome.

Holy Rome blushed for a second before realizing Ezio was starting at the two with surprise in his eyes. 'Crap! He saw me get up' Holy Rome thought to himself. He had to think quickly to get Italy and himself out of there. "Uh, Italy, I think we should go get some lunch now." He said.

"Can we have pasta?" Italy replied.

"Yes, we can have pasta." Holy Rome said and then dragged Italy out of the alley way and away from Ezio as fast as he could.

Ezio stood there for a few more minutes before turning around and going home. Today was probably the weirdest day in his life so far. He only hoped the next day would be less so.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

the end

Author: Inspired by this pic: ?q=hetalia+ezio+HRE#/d37bpai

Hoped you guys liked it. please review and fav!


End file.
